Talisman

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I like to see you as a sort of talisman or some mysterious content hidden inside a small porch and I should only open up the porch in times of need and when I have no other choice, as seen on television. Like the characters seen on TV, I don't know what's inside the porch; it may be something that can get me out of the fix I am in, or simply a piece of paper telling me to "pray hard".

Therefore, I am apprehensive of sending you E-mails unless I have something to say or ask. You may reply me and save me from the worries, or ignore me and I have to pray hard and think of other ways to ease my worries. But then again, I wouldn't want you to think that I am "using" you and contacting you because I need help from you.

You're a person that I hold great respect and admiration for. Naturally, I am afraid of getting near/ attempting to get closer to you (although now I am closer than I used to before). I wouldn't want you to have any negative impression of me or whatsoever.

You may just be any other person, just like that new classmate, that new OG mate, and that random student I met in the library. Actually, you're just like them. But still, I couldn't face you like I face those people. It's definitely not your looks that I'm attracted to because people around me describe you along the line of "normal". I think it's your passion, your drive and your attitude. It's probably because you're doing something that I failed to pursue... I am seeing in you the lack that I have in me.

I can't help worrying about what's gonna come next, all the anxiety of going to a new place.

I hope we could be in touch and probably come up with some plans.

I hope when I opened that small porch that contains the talisman in a few weeks time, it will ease my worries and not a paper that ask me to fret for myself.

I don't know if I ever get to see you again, and don't know where you will go... But still, if we can keep in touch, I'm sure we can meet again. I won't think that I know you a tad too late because meeting and knowing you, even if I will never get to meet you again, is always better than nothing at all.

I really hope we can meet again soon...